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We Be NBA Jammin’!!!

I have a confession to make: I’ve read all four of the Twilight books and I kinda liked them. In fact, I kinda liked them a lot. I liked them so much in fact that I read the entire “saga” in about a week and entirely using the Kindle App for my iPod Touch. Now, there are times when I feel completely vindicated in the week-long obsession that I experienced not too long ago. You know, I can point out that, as an aspiring writer, it’s essential to read as much variety as possible. Then there’s the fact that everyone has these guilty pleasures that they try their damnedest to keep to themselves. Who doesn’t have something they love that is completely embarrassing? I mean, 658 people bought the album by that super annoying plastic-blonde chick and her trash-stache sporting husband that starred on the MTV crapfest The Hills. But then I see a blog or video made by and for other Twilight fans and I realize that 98% of them are 11-15 year old girls. Yeah, it’s during those times that I hope no one ever finds out that I’m also a fan. Which is why I’m writing about it here; it’s the only way I can get it off my chest while being sure that no one finds out about it. (Side-note: It made me sad to type that dig at TheSpin. I know there are some readers out there. Right? Surely me and Mrs. Mike aren’t the only ones who are fans of my wit…*Sigh*)

Last week I wrote about the upcoming trailer that Spike was going to debut for Wii-exclusive NBA Jam. I even posted a sort of teaser trailer courtesy of the fine folks at Kotaku. I tell you right now that teaser had nothing on the ridiculous epicness that is the full trailer. If BA Baracus kidnapped me and then had Ivan Drago threaten to punch me in the face if I couldn’t do justice to the trailer, I’m not sure I’d have it in me. I could say that I believe this game, if EA marketing does it’s job, has the potential to be a console seller. I could say that the thought of Shaq shoving Jason Kidd down to the ground, stealing the ball in the process, and then driving full court in Turbo mode before going up for a rim shattering jam only to throw an alley-opp to ‘Bron-Bron at the last second may be as life changing as Phoebe Cates was. (Side-note: I try to keep TheSpin PG-13 at the most, but any male born between like 1979 & 1983 should have an appreciation of Ms. Cates that may be severely underrated. While Samantha Micelli & Winnie Cooper were the first childhood crushes of a massive portion of the males in my generation, there’s a good chance that Linda Barrett represented another significant first…) Or, I could say that NBA Jam represents what could be the Wii’s best chance to make the HDC’s fanboys all over the world drool with envy prompting them to write angry letters to EA demanding the title be ported over. I’m fairly certain that at this point BA Baracus would say he pities the fool who’s about to get punched in the face by Drago and then he’d wink at the Russian Monster who would then crush my face while muttering, “If he dies, he dies.” So, let’s pretend that I didn’t attempt to convey how retardedly and stupidly awesome NBA Jam looks, and allow me to just show you. Enjoy, and stay thirsty my friends.

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